Reason for Self-Examination

Lately, I have been slowing down on many of the hobbies (except anime viewing) that I have been hitting head-on for a while. I have also been spending most of my free time either watching anime or playing with my DS Lite, which, aside from the anime watching, is very abnormal for me. I began thinking to myself that I should recap where in the world I stand with all the roles I have in real life and online in order to better visualize what I do and everything I should be putting my time and effort into. Clearly depicting just how much my life is split between reality and the net should be interesting…

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Gathered Evidence

KEY:

Internet

Reality

Important

Unimportant

Neutral

Committed Roles Lover Full-Time Job Friend Anime-Source.com Staff Writer CyberConnect Corp. Staff	Aspiration Roles Fictional Writer Illustrative GFXer Voice Actor Voice Actor	Other Roles Blogger DS Gamer Anime Otaku
Active Roles (done daily or within the last two days) Lover Full-Time Job Friend CyberConnect Corp. Staff Blogger DS Gamer Anime Otaku	Slowed Down Roles (haven’t done in 5 days or more) Anime-Source.com Staff Writer Illustrative GFXer Voice Actor	Neglected Roles (haven’t done in over a month or haven’t pursued) Fictional Writer Voice Actor

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Observations

So, according to this list, it seems I have been neglecting roles that are the most difficult to reach, but have been the most desired in my life. Why is this? There are roles that should not be active (Blogger, DS Gamer). My Anime Otaku qualities are forever active, but only occupy about an hour of my day. What’s more, becoming a voice actor though online means is [my] first step to taking myself seriously and being taken seriously in reality. So, I could remove Voice Actor from Neglected roles, which would leave only Fictional Writer as the only neglected role, and, above all, my most sought after goal. Slowed Down Roles are right where they need to be: Neutral. Importance in Reality wins over Internet, and there is nothing I find important on the Internet — as it darn well should be.

Diagnosis

I had believed I had many more roles than this, but at the moment, this is where I stand. For the most part, I am sorted as I need to be. However, since I do not have anyone or anything pushing me to write other than the sight of overflowing manga at Borders that only serves to discourage me anyway, that simple neglect is most unsettling and sad. This needs to change…immediately.

Feel free to try this on yourself. Masochism is fun.

Currently Listening To: Various Artists – Glove On Fight – “Power of Love”