Many of us, including myself, find ourselves trying too hard to be good. Not just being “good people,” but doing good deeds, doing good work, etc. Often times, it’s the people who don’t think about the good they are doing that wind up doing the most good. So maybe, many of us should quit trying too hard to rise up to something that we already know we can achieve in time.

Trying too hard to meet expectations that I have set for myself is one thing that I struggle with. I’m always striving towards something, hoping that I can see myself take another proverbial step towards attaining it. Though I am happy to say that I no longer am driven by the expectations of others, the saying that “we are our own worst critic” comes to mind every time. As an overambitious perfectionist who comes from a slightly below average family, I clearly had to change much of myself to overcome circumstances to get to where I am now.

How do you know you’re trying too hard? For me personally it’s when:

• I am telling myself that something needs to get done.
• I’m stressing over the fact that nothing was accomplished instead of taking proper note of what was.
• I am easily distracted (a very big one for me.)
• I realize I am too paralyzed to make progress.

While it’s not easy to relax and become one with the flow of time and progress, placing too much emphasis on any one thing is just as deterrent to one’s aspirations towards a lofty goal. Though my isshoukenmei lifestyle demands that I put a heartfelt effort into everything that I do, there is a point where we all just need to take a step back, assess ourselves and the tasks before us, and just quit trying to force our way through the door.

With a gradual, controlled effort on our part, we could very well discover that the door may have already been unlocked. We just had to not assume we had to try so hard to open it.

I certainly want to master the art of opening more doors to my destiny without so much stress. What about you?